"We were best friends in high school."
“Did you both know the other was gay?”
“I knew she was. She didn’t know I was.”
“So how did she find out?”
“I wrote her a love letter.”
"I’m going to be an inventor. I already have some good ideas."
"Oh yeah? What are they?"
"I had an idea for an electronic cigarette with a whatchamacallit in it that makes mist so you feel like you’re smoking but you really aren’t. And also a toothbrush where you put the toothpaste in the bottom and it comes out the top when you’re brushing."
"Those are some solid ideas. Anything else?"
"A fart gun."
"I tend to be cynical about a lot of things, but Maya Angelou is somebody that no matter how much I pick her apart, she still has integrity. She was a victim of incest and rape, and she worked as a stripper. And now she’s a literary icon and Nobel Laureate. It goes to show that life is cumulative, and you can’t devalue any type of experience."
FOUR HOURS LEFT in dftba.com’s annual sale! Every order—even if you get all nine of these posters and ship them to Kuala Lumpur—ships for $3.
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ONE HOUR! Move yur bunz